Ep. 9: Madison Turns 28 (again)
So instead of a dramatic origin story or a highlight reel, we’re doing what she actually does best: breaking down confidence in a way that’s practical, uncomfortable, and effective. 🥂
If you’re waiting to feel confident before you act… bad news. That’s not how it works. Madison’s confidence wasn’t unlocked by luck, looks, or vibes. It was built through exposure, detachment, and intentional self-trust.
Here’s what she shared and what actually matters.
1. Confidence Comes From Exposure, Not Affirmations
Confidence isn’t built by thinking positive thoughts.
It’s built by removing the safety net.
The biggest shift happens when you stop hiding, stop managing perception, and stop softening yourself for other people’s comfort.
Confidence grows fastest when you remove the thing you’re using to protect yourself.
No rehearsing.
No disguises.
No performing the version of yourself you think people want.
When you show up fully as you are and realize you survive… your nervous system recalibrates.
That’s confidence.
2. Stop Performing for Approval
People-pleasing and confidence cannot coexist.
When your behavior is optimized for:
being liked
being chosen
being validated
You hand your self-worth to strangers.
Confidence starts the moment your mindset shifts to:
“This is me. Take it or leave it.”
That internal posture changes everything:
how people treat you
how you speak
how much nonsense you tolerate
3. Radical Self-Acceptance Is a Power Move
This one makes people uncomfortable… which is usually how you know it works.
Real confidence comes from stopping the constant effort to “fix” yourself into something more acceptable and instead leaning fully into what is.
Not as a coping mechanism. As a strategic choice.
When you accept yourself completely, you remove everyone else’s leverage.
There’s:
nothing left to exploit
nothing to weaponize
nothing to take away
That’s real confidence.
4. Confidence Isn’t Loud… It’s Calm
Confidence doesn’t need:
over-explaining
defensiveness
justification
It shows up as composure, especially under pressure.
Calm responses.
Clear boundaries.
No scrambling.
If you want to build confidence fast, start here:
say less
pause longer
stop reacting immediately
Silence is often the strongest signal.
5. Read, Reflect, Repeat
Confidence doesn’t come from one breakthrough.
It comes from consistent inner work:
reading
reflection
challenges that force growth
questioning old narratives
Confidence compounds when you invest in your internal world the same way you invest in your career.
The Takeaway
Confidence isn’t something you’re born with. It’s something you practice choosing, especially when it’s uncomfortable.
Confidence isn’t built by controlling how you’re perceived. It’s built by letting go of the need to control it at all.
That’s the shift.
Happy birthday, Madison! WE LOVE YOU BITCH.
